I'm obviously giving this year's Matty's Best Movie Award to a timeless classic, which (fortunately) was preserved and not destroyed by a new live action movie.... Charlotte's Web.
One of my favorite childhood stories, retold with a bunch of actors I don't care about playing the voices of the animals turned out to be quite a good movie indeed (minus fart jokes and crows, which were NOT in the book).
If the movie doesn't quite milk your udders, the soundtrack in the background will, composed by Danny Elfman, who decided to sign on for this move rather than Spiderman 3 (sure to make more money than this movie). I'll hand it to Danny- it's not as creepy as his other soundtracks (in which I usually enjoy the creepy undertones of his music), but it still came through perfectly, carrying on the flavor of E.B. White's book, while adding his own shit.
If you still aren't quite tickled with neither this movie nor the soundtrack, sit in the theatre and consider everything that happened to the good people of Somerset County while you listen to Sarah Maclauclin's Ordinary Miracles, which plays during the credits of the movie.
Hopefully you'll get all the meaning and hidden understanding and somewhat-irony of this under-estimated timeless tale.
If you STILL can't appreciate Charlotte's Web, just go fucking read the book already, and cry your fucking eyes out (like I do every time I read it).
Good job, Dakota Fanning, for not making me throw up (as your previous movies have). You actually were a convincing Fern Arable. I was quite happy with you, and forgive you for your last movies. Please don't undermine my new confidence.
So congrats, cast and crew of Charlotte's Web!!! You win!
And shame on the rest of Hollywood.... 2006 was a year of stupid-ass movies!!!!
