on an unexpected friend.
Homebody Hannah walks into R. Nixon Elementary School every day, carrying with her a burden- she does not like her new school.
Ever since she moved to Florida from New York this summer with her family, it has been one surprise after another- each one proving that the move was not all that she expected. Her school is a little more "data-driven" than she's used to, and the parents of this school are a little too involved for her taste (meaning they can be pains in the ass).
Homebody Hannah also tells me that she's very astounded that the people are not all quite what she expected either. The men she's met in the bars of Port Prozac have been a little... well.... let's say "unevolved." You see, Hannah chooses her words wisely. She doesn't like to talk bad about others.
Hannah's not quite sure of the reasons, but she hasn't gotten as much time to lay on the beach as she'd like (whether it's school related or not). She would like more time to focus on herself, but finds that her time runs out quickly each day, as she likes to be in bed at 9:00.
Every day I watch Hannah from across the hall, teaching patiently, organizing meticulously, and planning carefully all day long.
When I first met her, I wasn't sure we'd be friends, but as life likes to show us- sometimes there are surprises. You see, for some reason Hannah and I are very good friends, and continue to enjoy our extreme differences in personalities.
I believe that these sorts of friends are important- as no one else but them can quite push us to our limits and let us explore different ideas and thoughts through them.
Which is why I compiled this list of things I would like to do with Hannah someday, just to see her do it (and laugh).
Things I'd like to do with Homebody Hannah
1. Make prank phone calls to Mr. Collins, as he would never suspect Hannah of doing such a thing.
2. Wrestle her.
3. Throw her fully clothed into a swimming pool, and then jump in after her.
4. I would to talk dirty to Hannah in a crowded elevator, and she will not speak in English back, but rather make various animal noises showing her willingness to comply with my requests.
5. Attend a speed dating session with Hannah, and both of us would use our 5 minute increments with all the "dates" to explain to these "dates" why they probably do not deserve to be dated. Then leave with each other, clearly content and pretending we'd found love with one another.
6. Go rollerblading with Hannah.
7. Rent 4 porns... watch, drink, and take detailed notes.
8. Make a sand castle... and let Hannah destroy it in a wild fashion.
9. I would like to see Hannah flash the Disney cruise ships coming out of Port Prozac on Sunday night. I not only support this behavior- but would also enjoy flashing the Disney cruise ship. I'd imagine there'd be quite a racket following it, as soccer moms would be screaming, covering all children's eyes on all 4 decks. Things could get loud- they pack that ship full!!!
10. Take Hannah into the large sex store about a mile away from me. I keep a tally of how many times she's murmur her favorite line to murmur--- "Oh dear."
